EFFORT.
what's effort to them? what we do, they do not see, they do not bother, they choose not to notice, they choose to think that its just a little effort we've put in. even if the effort that i put in cant match to theirs, there's still effort put in. what's our best may not be their standard of best. if they still choose to think that we're not putting in effort, so be it. if they choose to think that they're the only ones TIRED, i'm so sorry to say that they're wrong. just ask any one of us. we're ALL tired. why put us down? respect? you want us to respect you all? you want the members to respect us and you all when you dont respect us at all? i'm sorry, i'm not up to your standard.

RESPONSIBILITY.
i miss the good old days. :/ now everything i do, every decision i make, i act with with consideration beforehand, i make sure that what i do is correct, i make sure that the decisions i make can only be right right and right. do they even care? no, not at all. it's getting really stressful in band.. where have the days of just enjoying playing a piece of music in band gone to? what i do wrong, is my fault. what the members do wrong, its also my fault. cant they even do their tiny winy bit to help? like ensure that their shirts are tucked in at all times, or even to just remember their instrument numbers, two numbers. just TWO.

oh wells.
i was the worst speaker for that baozhangriji thing, and i emphasize again, the worst, the worst, the worst. not that i gave myself that title. well the teacher did.
HOW GREAT. anyway, i know it myself too. i shall treat that a an opportunity for me to improve. right. i really reallyyyyyyy reallyyyyyyyyyyyy need to improve. I SHALL! (:

hohohohoho. lots of homework to be done. i dont know why i'm even online when i should be doing my work. i just feel like putting my books aside and go to sleep. forever?

career fair tomorrow. botanical gardens on saturday. hope they'll be fun! (:


BYE.